Front Page Reviews & AIR

The nights are short

but the years are long

when you’re alive

-Red Hot Chili Peppers, I’m With You

 

That sounds pretty cliché, man.

-Joe

Joe walked out into the emptiness, and I sat there in my post-holiday haze at my parent’s house in southern Rhode Island, wondering what to write about. An empty rocks glass yawned on the table in front of me.  The ocean tangled with the breeze and slapped and scraped against the house. Blue flames of debauchery licked tiredly at my bruised synapses.  Another semester of adjunct work, of staying up late to write sentences that it seemed no one would read, of literary rejections that now announced themselves with the bright chime of email on my iPad.  Another semester of our band playing loud guitars in bars where hipsters tuned in but then dropped out.

 

 

It wasn't all bad, I thought, filling my cup and watching the lone ice cube fight tirelessly against the boozy storm.  I've got an awesome family, and over the last year I've become an uncle.  I've got an unbelievable girlfriend, a hilarious group of friends staggered across the country--many here in Boston.  I've got music and guitars and the Portuguese National Soccer team and books and art and the city sprawled around me in the cold, Christmas-light night.  Our band's got an upcoming show in NYC for the first time, even. 

So what was this malaise, then, I wondered, as I watched the icy ship succumb to the creeping Kentucky sea?  Holiday blues?  That was even more cliché, and it wasn't even New Year's yet--I didn't have a headache and a stomach full of regret as an excuse.  I sat and I pondered.  It was something about this time of year—this counting down of days, hours, minutes, even seconds—that was stealing the music from my ears. 

I stared at the list in front of me—I’d hoped it would inspire me.  My ‘Goals for 2011’ referenced the personal: learn slide guitar, publish the novel, become a vegetarian, sell CDs; the practical: floss more, diet, run a marathon, save money, be more green; the abstract: go see the house where you grew up, do more yoga, travel somewhere new…but what was the point?  Some were accomplished, and some would be re-printed and hung above my desk to glare at me in the pale light of dawn.  The count-down would continue, year after year, day after day.  What the hell was the point?  It was all cliché, everything.  As a matter of fact, so was any rumination on said sad little list of unfulfilled goals, or that unshakable feeling that had accosted my 32-year-old brain lately: that maybe time was not on my side.

In the icy silence, the sun had long since melted over the ocean, a mile down the road.  The blackness of night vice-gripped the house.  Where had my sister and Joe gone?  Where were my parents?  Where was the dog?  My glass was empty, and my eyes searched out the clock on the microwave, but the day-glow digits shivered and spun and shorted out.  Blank.  The sliding door creaked shut, and the lights puffed out.

"Um, hello?"

No one answered.  I leapt from my chair and looked out the window at the driveway.  All the cars were gone.  The light switches flipped up and down, impotent.  So the electricity had gone out and I'd gotten drunk and lost track of time and my family abandoned me and even took the dog because they were unsure of my fragile mind state and here I was.  For some reason, I sat back down at the table.  Moonlight shot in through the porch door like spray paint. I finished my drink as the table began to tremble.  My cell phone!  It...was out of power.  The front door suddenly rattled and shook, and then blew off of its…What the-

"Brian?"

The voice behind me was as rusty as an old screen door.

"Who's that?"

"Fuckin' terrible out, can you give me some shelter?"

I spun around.  There was a dark figure slouched in the doorway.  His clothes were tattered.  Although I knew I should be terrified, a strange feeling of transparent ease came over me, one I associated with handshake drugs and Phish concerts.  I tried to stand, but some type of force clamped my shoulders and pressed me in to my seat.

 

 

It was his hands. They were enormous, gnarled appendages; it was like shouldering a heavy load.  "Heh, heh," he laughed softly.  A match blazed in the darkness, and in the reflection of the windows I could make out the wrinkles in his face, his expressive, worn features, and a cowboy hat pitched low.  "You know why I'm here, right Mate?"

The smoke mixed with my hazy state. It was suddenly difficult to remember and to forget.  The darkness spread its arms.  Before became after.  The morning dawned and the stars shot across the sky.  Or was it just my imagination?  I coughed and tried to stand up again, but my legs shivered and shook and I fell across the table.  The wood was soft against my cheek.

"Ah, now you're getting a taste of it."  The visitor sat across from me and kicked his boots up.

"What? I don't understand..."  Talking became immensely difficult.  My eyes were drawn to his craggy face.  It felt...familiar.  Somehow.

"Your 19th nervous breakdown, man.  I'm here for the emotional rescue."

"I'm not--"

"There's something going on with you, right?  You're waiting here at the table for something, someone.  Skirting the moonlight mile?  Dreaming of some girls from your past?  Reconsidering your biggest mistake?"

"Well..."  It was night again.  We were outside on the deck.  The stars loomed and wilted.

"It's not regret...It's the problem of--"

"Time," he exhaled.

Euphoria!  "Yes! Wait, who are you?"

"Call me Father Time.  Or Daddy-O, Papa, Chief, MC...Whatever floats your boat, Mate."

I thought of the sinking ship in my bourbon, but it was as if I was viewing it from another year.  But I was also right there--the glass reappeared in my hand, full.  The ice was whole and smooth.

"Nice, eh?"  He lifted his glass to mine and the clink slinked across centuries.

 

"But let's talk about you," he continued.  "Or are you starting to get it?"

"I'm..."

"Look, Mate...here's the deal.  There is no time.  I am time.  You are time.  I'm talking about you!  I'm free, you're free, we're all fucking free.  It is all in your head--every concept, every memory, every goal.  Every month and year and second, all that shit that’s tripping you up, or should I say, out? Every cry of birth and groan of defeat.  All.  Up.  Here."  He pointed to his head, and then out across what used to be my parent’s yard.  Mountains rose in the sunrise and buildings clamored skyward and then fell.  I watched it all across the sheen of the Atlantic, then the Pacific.  The Indian Ocean and the Black Sea. 

"But where are the people?" I asked, my eyes tearing in the wind.

"You don't get it yet, do you," he yelled into the rushing air.  His hat blew off and his hair spun in slow circles of hypnosis.

I gripped the railing and tried to speak.  All around us tidal waves crashed and sucked at the shore.  Tiny rocks stung my ankles.  "But-"

"The fucking people, Mate! They're the ones who complicate things!  Time ain't shit without the people.  And people aren't anything without...without..."

"Without what?" I cried, but he pressed a crumpled cigarette pack into my palm and disappeared into the wind.

***

I woke up at the oak table at my parents’ house.  My neck was cramped and as I pulled myself up, my head throbbed.  In the dark silence, the microwave clock read 9:03am.  My phone registered 66 text messages.  Out in the yard, I could see my family drinking coffee in the December sunshine. 

I uncurled my palm and examined the scrawl on the Marlboro scroll:

Brian, here are some upcoming albums that will allow you to hear to the music play in 2012.  I hope you know what I mean.   Regards, Father Time, or KTHR

 

Without the Music, 2012:

Gary Clarke Jr: 

Young-blood bluesman was the only newcomer to be chosen to play Clapton's Crossroad's Festival in 2010.  Has an EP out with Warner Brothers and his LP is slated for early 2012.  He describes it: "You can look forward to some loud guitar, some sweet guitar.  I'm trying to mix up all my influences in one shot, but not come out too crazy.  Some old-school blues, then kind of branching out into other things that I'm into, like R & B and Rock & Roll..."  Father Time, aka KTHR, digs the blues, baby!

 

 

Lupe Fiasco:

Food and Liquor 2 supposedly will be out at some point in 2012.  Currently catch him endorsing BMW in a commercial on the new radio…which unfortunately means…television.  (Which KTHR thinks is bullshit).

 

Nine Inch Nails:

Fresh off work on the soundtracks to The Social Network and more recently, David Fincher's The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Trent Reznor has said that his devout attention is back on his original band, and hinted at a new LP in 2012.

 

The Shins:

Five years after the fantastic Wincing the Night Away, and no doubt ebullient after his work with Danger Mouse in Broken Bells, James Mercer has gathered his shin-pads together and will release Port of Morrow in 2012.  KTHR reportedly empathizes with issues regarding, er, band dynamics.

 

Morrissey:

A rumored new album by the Ex-Smiths singer and lyricist was due in December of 2012, but recent comments by the man himself have suggested the contrary. 

 

Yeasayer:

Two years after Odd Blood (which KTHR wrongly predicted would be bigger than MGMT’s 2^nd album…He loves Yeasayer), singer Chris Keating has revealed that they have more than 22 songs ready, and cite David Bowie and Aaliyah as influences. Yes, Aaliyah.  Keating also says of the surplus of songs (that apparently could make up 2 albums) that “one is the real album with three-and-a-half to four minute pop songs, and another tht’smore like a soundtrack and released on the internet.”  Whatever that means.

 

Dirty Projectors:

In a recent interview, chief projector Dave Longstreth said the album will be done by the Spring.  It was recorded in an abandoned house that Longstreth claims is haunted.  “ A lot of the songs are about horror or fear,” he says, including “Maybe That Was It,” a song that supposedly is a response the Strokes’ 2001 album Is This It.

 

Grizzly Bear:

Not much news or hype to exploit here, but the End of the Road Festival 2012 will supposedly be their last show before recording a new album…

 

Cat Power:

Feline songbird and whirling stage dervish Charlyn Marie Marshall has hinted that new material will not see release until summer 2012.

 

Black Sabbath:

(KTHR, loves Sabbath!)  The band has announced they’ll reunite in their original four man line-up for the first album in 33 years and a 2012 world tour.  Guitarist Tony Iommi: “It’s now or never. We are getting along great. Everything’s really good.” 

 

Mumford and Sons:

They’ve debuted ‘Ghosts That We Knew” on a live radio show in Philly, and “Enemy” on the soundtrack to the cinematic adaptation of Wuthering Heights, but there is now debate whether the new album will drop in 2012 or not.

 

Pearl Jam:

Even in the midst of their 20^th anniversary celebrations, the band laid down a batch of new tunes recently in LA.  Bassist Jeff Ament:  “We’re at least at the halfway point.  The first handful of songs we had are a great, great start.  It’s been really important for us that in the middle of all this, we got togther and recorded a bunch of songs.  It sort of gave us a breath…” 

 

Sigur Ros:

Even with the release of their new concert film and live album INNI, the Icelanders plan to release a new LP this coming Spring.  It’s been reported that the new studio is set in a space once occupied by a swimming pool, and that although initial sessions proved difficult, the quartet has ‘found its new focus.’ 

 

 

The Killers:

The band told Spin they expect this to be their “best album ever,” after the somewhat lackluster Day and Age.  They had shot for 2011, aiming for “before the world ends,” but now confirm that it’ll be out sometime in this new year.

 

The Mars Volta:

Due out early in the year and two years in the making, the band says Grinderman has been an influence, and that the record has a ‘kraut rock sound,’ a concept that intrigues KTHR to no end.

 

U2:

Some conflicting reports…Bono:  “We have so many new songs, some of our best…I’m putting some time aside to just go and get lost in the music.”  But the Edge claims “It’s quite likely you might hear from us next year, but it’s equally possible that you won’t.”  KTHR hopes that we do—he has quite the affection for Bono.

 

Bruce Springsteen:

The Boss will release a new album in the next few months, and he says that it’s “really unusual and the best thing that he’s done in years.”

 

Outkast:

After respective solo albums from Andre 3000 and Big Boi, Outkast have promised a group joint due out in early 2012.

 

Andrew Bird:

The multi-talented instrumental aviator has announced that Break It Yourself will be hatched on March 6^th, 2012.

 

Heartless Bastards:

On February 14^th, 2012, Arrow will be released by the Austin, Texasgarage-rockers, on Partisan Records. A North American tour will support the record.

 

Sleigh Bells:

Escaping genres once again, NYC duo Sleigh Bells will release Reigh of Terror on the appropriate holiday, Valentine’s Day.  Click the link for a brilliant preview, mates.

http://prettymuchamazing.com/reviews/albumreviews/reignofterror

 

Nicki Minaj:

KTHR doesn’t know if this is more or less appropriate than the former, but Minaj will also drop Pink Friday, Roman Reloaded on Valentine’s Day.  KTHR is sure that the lyrics will border on romantic.

 

Soundgarden:

The reunited grunge legends target early 2012 as their release time; it’ll be their first record since 1996’s Down on the Upside.  Guitarist Kim Thayil describes the writing process: “We didn’t have a set way we wrote in the past…even if Chris (Cornell, vocals/guitar) writes a complete song, or Ben (Sheperd, bass) writes a complete song…sometimes we wrote a song as a jam…there was never a set thing like a Jagger / Richards, you know?” 

(Wink).

 

No Doubt:

The follow-up to 2001’s Rock Steady was slated for 2011, but the band pushed it to 2012 to make “the best album we possibly can.”  KTHR has reportedly always had “a thing” for Gwen Stefani…but who hasn’t?

 

Rage Against the Machine:

Rumors have been nixed and renewed, nixed and renewed, but it’s not looking good, folks…Sorry to be the bearer of bad news…There’s always the Nightwatchman.

 

Eminem:

KTHR loves rumors…but nothing too solid to report.

 

Frank Ocean:

“I need a dolla, dolla…” The debut album is coming out in 2012, and Ocean has reportedly told Kanye West that although he’s a huge admirer, he doesn’t want him on the record.  He wants to make his dollas on his own.  KTHR and the Mule salute his independence, even while questioning his sanity.

 

 

Jay-Z:

In a predictably bold proclamation, Jay-Z has alluded to new albums from himself, Kanye, and “The Throne” in 2012.  “We’re (all) really in a great place creatively,” Jay said in a recent interview with MTV. 

 

BlakRoc:

KTHR still listens to the Black Keys 2009 hip-hop odyssey, and although plans for a new album are tentative, there’s a killer Youtube video already, and one can only hope that this kind of raw blues power is what the new year has in store.

 

 

 

 

Cheers, Mate…

 

Father Time, aka, KTHR